From E! Online, October 1997

The X-Files, the Fall of the
Roman Empire and Beyond
Duchovny Online Chat

How would David Duchovny script the end of The X-Files? What famous person would he like to be for a day? And what's all this talk about a vomitorium? These answers--and dozens more--are all here.

The X man got thousands of questions when he stopped by E! Online for a live chat on October 16. Everyone's favorite special agent fielded as many as he could in the hour-plus he spent in our offices. Here's a complete transcript of the event.

Remember, the truth is in here somewhere.

From chupacabras: How hard was it to keep your legs shaved for Twin Peaks?
I used Nair, and I had never used it before. It was given to me by the makeup lady the night before. I put the Nair on and waited a few minutes, like they say to, wiped it with a towel--and it was quite sexy, really. Like after you shampoo a mangy dog and towel it dry.

From Megan Lloyd: Did doing Playing God get you interested in medicine?
Well, not real medicine, because that actually takes hard work and education. And if you've forgotten, I'm an actor. But I was interested in watching good professionals execute their profession. That's the most interesting thing about any profession--watching competent people do it.

From atomlin: What was your favorite aspect of college?
I think it was after I couldn't play basketball and baseball anymore, and I was forced to find something else to fall in love with--take my studies more seriously, take a certain girl more seriously. I fell in love for the first time, which actually had nothing to do with Princeton. It was just chance and luck that it happened at college.

From ellen_verpoorten: I'm 14. How were you at this age?
Fourteen is really hard. I remember it being hard. You're going through puberty. Your feet and nose are growing. You've got pimples--I'm talking about myself now, not Ellen--hopefully Ellen's having a better time of it. But you're not a boy, not a man--you're in between. But it gets better, by the time you're almost 40.

From Megan Lloyd: If your house was on fire, and you could only save three things, what would they be? (Assuming Blue could get out on her own.)
Megan, you alarmist! I'd get my wife (assuming she didn't ride out on Blue), her dog, George (assuming both of them didn't hop up on George and ride him out). That's all the living things in there. I don't know why I'm trying to save the house, because I don't own one. It's a rental--let it burn.

From nitasha: Do you have a favorite band? If so, who?
I guess the Stones. Kind of boring, huh? There was a great band on Conan O' Brien that I liked. I think they were called Somebody Bradley and the Blackwater Experience. They had a blind singer who was amazing, and I got a free CD.

From nicegalfromohio: Do you think you are a sex symbol? How does it feel to be one?
Well, if I say no, I don't have to answer the second part...It's like that's something for other people. It doesn't really affect me. It's like getting your hair dyed--it looks like that's the color, but it's not your real hair color.

From hollym: Was that nutty letter you read on the Late Show real, or did you make it up?
It was real. And it was just beautiful that I could find it. I don't really read that much mail anymore, but I was idly flipping through my assistant's desk and found that letter.

From horseshue: Where was Playing God filmed, and how did it interact with your X-Files schedule?
It was filmed in L.A., and I shot it in six weeks when I had eight weeks off from The X-Files last year.

From wanrachnee: What are you going to be for Halloween?
Asleep.

From zods1: How is married life?
Fantabulous!

From beckybabe: Tell me why your movie is better to see than others that are opening on October 17.
It's a little film, not a blockbuster--not like the Pacino movie out this week. Our movie is like The Little Engine That Could. It's a great story and better than any movie I've seen in the last two or three years. The other reason is that I'm in it and want to keep making movies. So pleeeeeeease go see it, or I'll quit making The X-Files.

From squirrel3: If you could go back in history to any time, which time would you choose and why?
I wouldn't mind a little Roman debauchery. A little late Roman Empire--not much power left, only decadence. I just want to spend some time in the vomitorium.

From jvalori1: Think you and Téa will do any movies or possibly a sitcom together? (I'm assuming you will have a long future together, since you are obviously in love with her.)
I doubt we'll do any TV together. I'd like to work with her at some point, just as I'd like to work with any actor who I think is fantastic, but we'd really have to think about how we could do that--whether it would be a smart thing to do for us as married people.

From luckysprkl: Any hints about The X-Files season premiere?
It's going to be a two-parter to start the year, which means that's a three-parter going back to the cliffhanger from last year. It will be an excellent three-parter, especially the third part.

From misshamm: Did you enjoy acting as Eugene Sands in Playing God? How is he different than Fox Mulder?
Yes, I enjoyed it. Every role is very different for so many reasons. But really, the final analysis is from you, not from me.

From gchick1013: You're probably asked this a lot, but in the upcoming X-movie, will the characters get a little closer?
Closer than what? Yes. And no. Possibly. I think maybe. Yeah, somewhat.

From mysterywoman: How is yoga? Still practicing?
Always practicing. Practice makes perfect.

From quantum1: What draws you to a project initially?
The script. The story. The character. It all starts from the script.

From kesha: Do you ever miss not being famous and just being able to go hang out wherever?
Yeah, everyday. Poor little rich kid!

From denali7: What do you think of all the craziness going on about you on the 'Net?
Specifically?

From taa: If you could write the ending for The X-Files, what would it be? Would Mulder find Sam, etc.?
No, I wouldn't resolve lots of issues because, even though people seem to say that they want all these questions resolved, if we were to resolve them, they'd be revealed as kind of silly issues. Once we know there are aliens, where do we go from there? I think the best part of the show is its lack of resolution, especially when you're dealing with wacky subject matter. But I can see it ending kind of like that Bob Newhart show, where Mulder wakes up in bed with his wife, Scully, and tells her he had this really weird dream.

From indigo13: Where are your infamous speedos?
They're mine. They've always been mine. Always will be. Fraying around the edges a bit; a little less elastic than they used to be; string on one side longer than the other; one tie knotted, the other not; should I go on?

From sato: In a few words, describe David Duchovny, the person.
Again, not so much for me to describe as for you.

From maninblac: I know that you wanted to play pro basketball when you were younger, but did you ever seriously consider athletics? I ask this because I read that you gave those horses in Tunguska a run for their money.
Yeah, I would've been a pro basketball player if I could have been. I wasn't nearly good enough. I'm fairly fleet of foot, though I'm sure any horse could run me down.

From Megan: Who are your role models? Who inspires you?
Martin Luther King Jr., Snoopy and Marlon Brando.

From nitasha: Are there any "Mulderisms" in Playing God?
No. There are "Eugene Sands-isms."

From qbotu: Did you keep the PG wardrobe?
No, but I stole what I wanted. And I had a velvet suit made just like the one Tim Hutton wears. I'm wearing it tonight on Keenen. I've had it for a year, but never had a chance to wear it.

From humbuggie: Are you coming to Europe to promote Playing God?
I don't know. I'm in the middle of filming the X-Files season. I don't have any time, and I don't know when it opens in Europe. Hypothetically, though, I'd love to.

From kathryn_j: Do you think it's strange that millions of people around the world who don't even know you adore you?
Yeah. But they see me playing a character on TV, so I kind of have an understanding of it. I don't have an experience of a million people. You can only experience one person at a time--unless you are in a hot tub.

From celestialj: How was Howard Stern yesterday? Was it as grueling as I'd expect?
No. Howard was a pussycat. He was really nice to me. I'm a big fan of his, and I think we had a funny talk. He's the best at what he does. I don't know exactly what that is, but he's the best at it.

From nitasha: Boxers, briefs or none?
I like to wear a Mae Joyce's T-shirt on my bottom half, as well. Luckily, I have skinny legs that can fit through the arm holes.

From misato: How long were you an English teacher, and what did you teach?
ENGLISH.

From amberh: Is it true that you are going to be in a Men in Black sequel?
No.

From Megan Lloyd: Do you have any regrets?
Regrets, I've had a few, but then again too few to mention!

From amberh: Is it true that you are going to be in a Men in Black sequel?
No.

From Megan Lloyd: Do you have any regrets?
Regrets, I've had a few, but then again too few to mention!

From chippysue: Are you looking over any good film roles at the moment?
I hope to be about too be. (Yes, I taught English!) The logistics of my hiatus dictate that I start looking at stuff now. But right now, there's nothing specific.

From Megan Lloyd: Who would you love to work with?
Martin Scorcese.

From mulderfan: Who was the person you enjoyed working with the most?
I loved working with Steve Railsback and Garry Shandling, and there was a woman in a show called "Oubliette" (X-Files epsiode)...yada, yada, yada.

From sonnyboner: What are your degrees from Princeton and Yale in?
I have an A.B. from Princeton in English literature, and I have a Masters and an A.B.D.(all but dissertation) from Yale in English literature. I also have a degree from The American Bartenders School. (That's true!)

From luckysprkl: Can you give us any hints about the XF movie?
If you send me $8.50, I'll tell you the whole thing.

From redsugar7: What was the first acting gig you got?
I played Albin Le Comte de la Tremouille in Schnitzler's The Green Cockatoo. Surely, you know this.

From buckmf: Do you consider yourself an actor or a movie star, if an actor is one who takes on different types of roles, while a movie star is one who is locked into a certain type of role?
I think I'm a little bit of both.

From plater: Did you feel there was a good audience reaction to the NYC screening of Playing God?
I didn't stay for the movie, because I've obviously seen it, but I was told that people were howling and laughing and cheering, and that it was a great audience response. I was really happy about that.

From snoopy10: How did it feel to come back to NYC, have the premiere and have crowds of fans cheering for you in your home town? (Saw Playing God's premiere. It was terrific!)
It was terrific! Thanks for saying it was terrific. It was great, but it was strange, too, because I grew up there and I'm used to walking down streets without being hassled. Then, to walk into a theater and have people screaming my name was a bit strange, really. I found myself sitting at a hotel later, winding down. I think I had to take four baths that day to wind down.

From sonnah: Are you and Téa planning to have kids?
Yeah, sometime. Not now, but sometime.

From jerome_kersey: Why were you so mean to Big Tad on the Kevin and Bean show on KROQ in L.A.?
I wasn't. That was all tongue in cheek. Tad and I were playing along. I think Tad is very funny!

From picaboo: Are you interested in writing and directing?
Sure. Yeah, both.

From demicju: You're apparently one of Dave Letterman's favorite guests. Do you prepare yourself for these guest spots?
Yeah, you have to prepare. It's entertainment; it's not really an interview. If you don't do your work, it makes Dave's work so much harder. I'd like to come on and just talk sometimes, but that's not the way talk shows are right now.

From buckmf: Do you consider yourself an actor or a movie star, if an actor is one who takes on different types of roles, while a movie star is one who is locked into a certain type of role?
I think I'm a little bit of both.

From plater: Did you feel there was a good audience reaction to the NYC screening of Playing God?
I didn't stay for the movie, because I've obviously seen it, but I was told that people were howling and laughing and cheering, and that it was a great audience response. I was really happy about that.

From snoopy10: How did it feel to come back to NYC, have the premiere and have crowds of fans cheering for you in your home town? (Saw Playing God's premiere. It was terrific!)
It was terrific! Thanks for saying it was terrific. It was great, but it was strange, too, because I grew up there and I'm used to walking down streets without being hassled. Then, to walk into a theater and have people screaming my name was a bit strange, really. I found myself sitting at a hotel later, winding down. I think I had to take four baths that day to wind down.

From sonnah: Are you and Téa planning to have kids?
Yeah, sometime. Not now, but sometime.

From jerome_kersey: Why were you so mean to Big Tad on the Kevin and Bean show on KROQ in L.A.?
I wasn't. That was all tongue in cheek. Tad and I were playing along. I think Tad is very funny!

From picaboo: Are you interested in writing and directing?
Sure. Yeah, both.

From demicju: You're apparently one of Dave Letterman's favorite guests. Do you prepare yourself for these guest spots?
Yeah, you have to prepare. It's entertainment; it's not really an interview. If you don't do your work, it makes Dave's work so much harder. I'd like to come on and just talk sometimes, but that's not the way talk shows are right now.

From wsoo: Are you doing any more Red Shoe Diaries?
Uh-huh.

From juicypeach: Congratulations on your movie Playing God. In the opening and closing scenes of last season's X-Files episode "The Field Where I Died" (one of my favorites from that season), you did a reading of Robert Browning's "Paracelsus." Did you personally choose that piece to recite? If not, who did? It almost looks like the idea for the episode was conceived from that excerpt.
No, I didn't. The writers found it. I didn't even know they were using Browning.

From jennl: Has there been any decision yet on whether or not The X-Files will move down to L.A. next year?
Not that I know of. I'm moving to L.A. next year--they can come join me if they want.

From meccaboy: What's your favorite basketball team? Player?
The Knicks. Present player: Starks. Favorite player of all time: Walt Clyde Frasier. Favorite play-by-play announcer of all time: Marv Albert. Free Marv NOW! Leave the man be!

From chanti_c: Do you plan to leave the Files after season five?
Nope.

From firstmerlyn: Are you planning to do any theater?
Yeah, in Showworld down on Times Square.

From beccaelizabeth: You've said that you believe in karma and that the most noble thing in life is to live without having an effect on the world at all. What does that mean?
It means pretty much what I said. We believe in the Western world that you're supposed to balance out your bad works with good works. But there's a certain way of thinking that is to leave the world exactly as you found it. That's kind of foreign to our thinking, which is probably why she's confused by it.

From nancy: I'm a psychologist in Australia. What psychological aspects of your Playing God character interested you?
How smart people can make stupid choices, and how somebody with that much seemingly going for him would have an emptiness that would have to be filled by drugs.

From a fan: How do you find time for your new marriage with all you have going on? I have a hard time finding time just with the work my husband and I do now!
You find time.

From Kelli: What's the most recent book you've read?
I read A Perfect Storm.

From Jen: Have you ever had a film or TV blooper?
Constantly. One of the best was when I pulled down an actor's pants all the way down past his ass when I was just supposed to pull them down a little bit.

From Pat: I found Paper Hearts to be your most moving work, especially the scene shot in the morgue. How do you prepare for such an emotionally gut-wrenching scene?
Secrets of the trade. A magician can't you show you how he does it, or it's no fun for anybody--and the magician doesn't get any more work.

From parismom: How does Blue get along with the new addition to your life. Does Blue love Téa as much as you do?
Yeah, she does. Téa has a dog, too, and the two of them actually get along pretty well.

From Shaila: Do you and Fox Mulder share any common traits?
Yes, we look almost exactly alike.

From Keith Clemons: How did you get your part on The Larry Sanders Show?
I had to sleep with Garry Shandling. No, I know Garry, and we'd talked about the idea of me having a crush on him but still being a straight man, and whether that would be funny or not. That's what I liked about it, it was never really resolved. It was just this strange thing. I'd like to go back and do it again, but I don't know what we're going to do. We were originally going to do this thing where we were playing basketball, and I would keep telling him, "Be rougher. Back into me." I was going to tell him, "All basketball comes from your ass. You gotta use your ass. Use your ass!" But we just didn't have time to film that. Maybe we'll do that this year.

From Michelle Leigh: Are you interested in acting on Broadway?
Sure, but I can't sing, I can't dance, and there aren't that many shows there anymore that aren't musicals. But performing in front of a live audience is the best feeling there is.

From Mick: How was the filming of the X-Files movie?
It was very much like the filming of the X-Files TV show.

From another fan: What's the one thing you wish someone would walk away with after seeing Playing God?
A T-shirt--or just that moral choices aren't always cut and dried. It's not that easy to live your life in a moral way. It's an adult point of view, not a kiddie movie like a lot of movies out there that seem like they're written by kids.

From Kathy: Do you listen to reviews? Do you even read what people say about your work?
I try not to seek it out, but it's very tempting when you pick up a newspaper or magazine that you know have criticisms of your work. It's so tempting. But my advice for anybody is to stay away from that stuff, because neither the good nor the bad means anything.

From Suzanne Chambers: There must have been some moment when you thought, Wow, I'm really famous. When was that, and what was it like?
I don't remember a moment, but I do remember realizing that I had become famous at some point, and that was awkward. But I didn't have a Hard Day's Night thing. People really love to ask questions about fame. Why is that?

From beccaelizabeth: What is your favorite word?
Favorite word? Has that ever been asked before? I don't know. Star.

From yet another fan: If you could be any person in the world, who would you be?
The President. I'd like to check out his day. Or Mick Jagger, a few years ago. Or a monk in a cave somewhere whose name escapes me. Or Meryl Streep. Or any singer. I'd love to have a great voice for a day.

From Tammie Partridge: Why doesn't Mulder have a bed in his apartment? He's always sleeping on the couch.
I think it describes Mulder as somebody that isn't a homebody, that doesn't lead a normal life. He doesn't cook, doesn't clean. He's just obsessed with work. He takes naps on the couch. It's kinda sad, really. And I think they ran out of money before they could make my bedroom.

From Liz: Do you really like turtlenecks?
I like mock turtlenecks. Are you referring to my recent spate of appearances? I like to wear a little women's T-shirt underneath because they get itchy--a little cotton midriff number.

From Junko Mitani: Have you thought about publishing some of your writing or your poetry?
Yeah, actually, over the last couple of weeks, I've been looking for a project for while I'm waiting around in the trailer between shots, which is a pretty considerable amount of time. And I thought about collecting all the things I've written over the years--which is pretty considerable--and putting them in a book. But I'm a little leery of publishing as a celebrity. I don't want to take advantage of that. And I don't want to be slaughtered because of it. Maybe I'll just write another book on couplehood.

Thanks for coming! Sorry if I didn't get to answer all your questions, or if I didn't seem to take all of them absolutely seriously. Sometimes, the best questions would take so long to answer, all I can really do is make a joke. And go see Playing God [opening October 18] tomorrow or the next day, or I will find out who you are and where you live, and I will track you down and force you to go see it personally!
~~Dave