EF=Eric Ferguson (WTMX DJ)
KH=Kathy Hart (WTMX DJ)
DD=Our beloved David, of course

EF: "Return To Me" opens this weekend...look, it's David Duchovny. Is that who this is?

DD: Yes, David here.

EF: How are you?

KH: Hi David!

DD: I'm good.

EF: David, you're not gonna go all Pat O'Brien/Access Hollywood on us, are you?

DD: What does that mean exactly? (Laughs) You mean speak in riddles?

EF: I caught that interview. That was lots of fun.

DD: Oh, You mean the cursing.

EF: You can't beat quality David Duchovny cursing.

DD: Oh, it was great because I was just fooling around. It was like my tenth interview of the day and I was just trying to amuse myself and I never thought they'd air that part.

EF: It seemed like that was Pat's favorite part.

DD: It was all of our favorite parts. I'm trying to get that tape myself.

EF: Sure that'd be a good outtake at the X-Files party or something. Welocme to the radio in Chicago. You were just here all last summer.

DD: You know, it was my first time in Chicago and I think about coming back all the time. I loved Chicago.

KH: Did ya? Did you have a chance to go out and have some fun?

DD: No.

KH: Oh (laughs) Bummer.

DD: But I love Chicago. The only fun I had--I was staying down there at the Ritz-Carlton--beautiful hotel and down the block there was this kinda public gymnasium and I wandered in there 'cause I heard the sound of the bouncing basketball and it drew me in. And I went in and I found a pick-up game with a bunch of cops that I played every Sunday while I was there. I got to play with some of your finest.

EF: And pretty much got to park anywhere in the city you wanted to after that.

DD: Yeah, I got some "get out of jail free" cards. These guys, they took me out a couple of times.

KH: That sounds like fun.

DD: They were REALLY fun. There's some rough players there.

KH: Well, you were a good basetball player, weren't you? In college and high school?

DD: What do you mean WERE?

KH: Oh, I mean you ARE. (laughs)

DD: They thought I was pretty good for a white man.

EF: How's your outside shot? Or do you like to go down on the block, David?

DD: You know, I like to do both. I'm not a great leaper, but I like to mix it up. I got a nose for the ball.

EF: You're not afraid to throw and elbow when you need to.

DD: You know, I like the ball. I like to get it. I like to pull it in like Rodman. I like to corral it.

EF: (laughs) You don't do anything else like Rodman do you?

DD: uh...I don't know what he does, really.

EF: I don't think anybody does anymore.

DD: I'd like that pink felt hat he wears sometimes.

KH: There you go, you look good in pink.

DD: Yeah, I do.

EF: Now David, we read this morning that you're going to be on the celebrity "Who Wants To Be a Millionaire". We have a David Duchovny celebrity question for you.

DD: Oh, boy. Now, this is for charity, you know. I might win a million dollars for charity. Can you imagine? I might win a million dollars for charity. OR I'll feel like a fool.

EF: No.

KH: C'mon, you went to Princeton and Yale.

DD: That doesn't matter. Do you think that the kind of questions they ask are like, legitimate, intelligent questions? They're going to ask me a question on like, 'What came first, "Mop and Glo" or "Fantastic"?'

EF: (laughs) Always go "Mop and Glo".

DD: Okay.

EF: Alright, here we go. Here's the question: David Duchovny's favorite memory of filming in Chicago is: A.) Playing basketball across the street with the kids from Twin Acres? B) Not having to answer to the name "Fox Mulder"? C) Bonnie Hunt making endless passes at the stars of her movie? Or D) Being accosted by a radio show producer on the set? What's your favorite?

DD: (laughs) Playing stickball with those kids. How do you know about that?

EF: We know many things, David.

DD: When you do things that are actually kind and fun, nobody ever hears about it. They only hear about--well, you actually didn't hear about--the bad stuff. But usually that's all you ever hear about.

EF: No. Word got around that you were a great guy. Kids were telling everybody that you came across the street and played with them.

DD: We had fun. They let me hit, which was nice. I love stickball. I grew up in New York and there's not a lot of people that play stickball anymore and these kids were playing and I just got out there. You guys play with that big, weird softball and that was kind of fun,too.

EF: Yeah, the big sixteen-incher.

DD: I like that. I'd like to play more of that game.

EF: Well, we need a short stop on our station team. You interested?

DD: Okay, I'll be right there. I need to break some fingers.

EF: Beautiful.

KH: See, now I though you might answer "D". Do you remember when the psycho radio-producer from our show...(plays theme from "Psycho" in the background)

DD: I do remember that. You asked me my FAVORITE memory.

EF: Oh, yeah...that must be your SECOND favorite.

DD: No, that wasn't bad at all. He just wanted to talk about that song.

KH: Which I'm sure you're tired of hearing about by now.

DD: I don't really hear that much about it. I just always got a kick out of it. I never got tired of answering those type of questions.

EF: Now how about "C"? Bonnie Hunt making endless passes at the stars of her movie? Did that get annoying at some point.

DD: (laughs) Well, it would have gotten annoying, but it was so amazing in its frequency and in it's lack of discretion and the fact that it extended from men to women to animals...

EF: (laughs)Sure...

DD: Well, you know there's a gorilla and dog in the film and they were not immune to her passes either.

EF: The woman has no shame.

DD: No shame--no editing impulse.

EF: Isn't Bonnie great? We had her on last week. She is just unbelievable.

DD: Bonnie and my wife are the funniest actresses in Los Angelos. I think so. Bonnie has amazing talent and she's just coming into her own. It's going to be a lot of fun to watch her career from here on in.

KH: Well, the movie is just hysterical. And I have to say that I am an X-Files fan and I thought 'Okay, am I gonna look up at the screen at Return To Me and see Fox Mulder?' And I didn't--it was very convincing. I was impressed.

DD: Well, I'm an actor, you know. (laughs)

EF: It's his thing.

DD: I went into acting to play different roles, believe it or not.

EF: You're hugable and lovable in this. You're an every man's man.

DD: So, what you're saying is that I'm hugable and lovable and also a man's man?

EF: Yeah. Once again you're acting talent comes through. You're able to pull off both of them.

DD: It's tough to do that. But Bonnie helped me by making passes at me all the time. Kept my confidence up.

KH: There's probably a lot of freak, X-Files/Fox Mulder fans that refuse to see you in anything but X-Files.

DD: But, you know, people say things like that, but I don't imagine that they actually exist. I think it's an idea that's created by people that have a lot of time on their hands (laughs). I don't know, I'm a fan of certain people, then I see these people go and do other things, and I think "Oh, that's great they do other things". I can't imagine that somebody would want me to keep doing the same thing til I die. But maybe they're out there.

EF: David, I read something and it was attributed to you, so tell me if it's true. You said that it's the final season for the X-Files and that it's reached a point where it's about the money. Is that true?

DD: No. Actually, it's really about the time. I have money. Money's not that important to me. it's great to have money for my kid, and all that. But I never got into it for the money. At this point it takes ten months of the year to shoot a season. I've been working my ass off for five years and I've only got three movies to show for it, and one of them is an X-Files movie. So, I need to do other things.

EF: Sure, I'm with you.

DD: It's just such a dibilitating schedule to work ten months, then if I want to do a movie, to work those two months that I'm off. Then to go back to the X-Files again.

KH: Plus, I'm sure you want to spend a little time at home with Madelaine.

DD: Oh, then there's THAT. (laughs)

KH: She's almost a year old now?

DD: Yeah, she'll be a year old April 24th. And when she was only two weeks old she flew to Chicago.

KH: Yeah, you guys started filming right when she was born. That had to be tough for you and Téa.

DD: Yeah, it was tough buckling her into that seat by herself and saying goodbye. She took the whole flight by herself it was pretty amazing. She was in the cockpit--the captain brought her in for the landing.

EF: (laughs) She wasn't carry on luggage or anything like that, right?

DD: We put her in the bin at first, but she started to cry and we had to take her out.

EF: David, I know you're a Princeton guy, a Yale guy. A very well-educated man. True or false you quit college to do you're first gig as a beer commercial?

DD: AS a beer commercial? Or as an actor in a beer commercial.

EF: You weren't actually the commercial...well, I don't know. IN a beer commercial.

DD: I was, yes. But I didn't just quit. It's not like I said "YES! I GOT A BEER COMMERCIAL! I'm quitting". It was just a way to pay the rent. I mean, it was great, I made a lot of money on that commercial. I think I'm still getting checks.

EF: Back to Return To Me...coming out this weekend. A great cast--David Duchovny, Minnie Driver, Carol O'Connor who is absolutely great in it...

DD: Don't forget Bonnie Hunt.

EF: Bonnie and Jim Belushi

DD: Isn't Jim great? I laughed harder at his scenes than anything. And I'm not an easy laugher. When he does that Chippendales thing...

KH: With his shirt off...that was good.

EF: Bonnie was telling us that Jim greased the skids in Chicago and got everything done.

DD: Well, Jim is a Chicago guy. You guys got a "House of Blues" over there, right?

EF: Sure, yeah.

DD: I never made it there. But he's a very cool guy and he's tremendously talented. I hope he starts to work a lot again.

EF: So, when are you coming back?

DD: To chicago? I don't know. At this point I would only be able to come back to work, I've been so busy. But I was really taken with that toddlin' town.

EF: Swanie, (Swanie is the WTMX producer) when does softball season start again?

Swanie: Two weeks

EF: Two weeks, David. We need you.

DD: You need a short stop?

EF: Sure, we'll find a spot for you.

DD: I can play some ball. You know, right by that gym that I was playing basketball at--you know that little park down there by the Ritz-Carlton? They play some of that big ball softball and I was like the kid on the sidelines. I wanted to get in.

EF: Well, we can't wait for you to come back.

DD: What about those winters though?

KH: They're not that bad

EF: Fortunately, we don't play softball in the winter.

DD: Get tougher!

EF: The movie is Return To Me. It opens this Friday...

DD: I think it's beholding to everybody in Chicago to see this film. I didn't realize it when I was doing it, but it's like a love poem from Bonnie to the city.

EF: It is. Hey, David, before I let you go. Kinda off the subject but I've got to ask you. You were on Letterman the other night? How's Dave? You know the rumors circulating after he broke bat on Gabriel Burn. How is he? Everything okay?

DD: What happened with Gabriel Burn?

EF: He apparently got into it with him about his ex-wife Ellen Barkin-she's marrying that billionaire.

DD: Did he get upset?

EF: Yeah, Gabriel got a little upset. He said Dave's on the wrong medication and he's like, really mean-spirited.

DD: Well, I love Dave Letterman. He's always good to me. I think he's great at his job. I mean, you go on a talk show sometimes you're going to get in trouble. I mean, he does it everyday. If I had to do a talk show everyday? I'm a moody guy. I might attack, too, at some point. (laughs)

EF: Well, you're the best. And best of luck on the movie. We really appreciate you taking the time.

DD: Thank you.

KH: And we'll be cheering for you on "Millionaire". When is that going to air? Do you know?

DD: I think... (to someone in the background) when does it air? My people...it's my people I talking to here in the background (laughs)...It airs May first, second and third. So you can see me go down in flames three days in a row.

KH: NO! You've got the fast fingers, don't you?

DD: Well, I don't have to do that. I'm already in.

EF: He's already in the hot seat.

DD: Yeah, All I'm doing is going down. I'm gonna use a life-line like on the fifty dollar one. "What is the number between five and seven".

EF: Remember, when all else fails go with "A"--"Mop and Glo"

DD: Okay, I'll take that to heart.

EF: Thanks, David.